


Don't Cross Officer Booty

by rankarana



Category: The iDOLM@STER Cinderella Girls
Genre: F/F, happy birthday mizuki!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-25
Updated: 2017-11-25
Packaged: 2019-02-06 12:47:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12817866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rankarana/pseuds/rankarana
Summary: Mizuki isn't quite sure what her relationship status is with Sanae, beyond 'really good friends who have also drunkenly made out at least once'.  But tonight it's Mizuki's birthday party, and Kaede and her friends have organised the ultimate present that might answer all her questions!...that, or they've just convinced Sanae to show up as a cop-themed stripper.





	Don't Cross Officer Booty

For the last five years – save one – Kaede, Miyu and the others had organised a surprise birthday party for Mizuki, and she really appreciated the gesture. Of course, she wasn’t sure if it qualified as a surprise any more after her friends had given her the exact same treatment each time, but there was something strangely reassuring about the scheduled, comforting reminder that they all cared about her. Naturally, she cared about them in turn!

And yet this year she wasn’t feeling it. All because Sanae, for some reason, said she wasn’t able to come.

“Any request for what we should order next?” Reiko, ever the mommy’s mommy, had a pen and paper at the ready; it seemed like overkill, but considering that Sanae had once armbarred Shin for ordering Dom Perignon 2006 instead of Dom Perignon 2005, precision was important.

…she really did wish Sanae was here right now.

“Shots!!” Miyu cried out, with more enthusiasm than Mizuki had ever heard from her, nodding very hard to agree with her own statement.

“And those widdle cheese biscuit things, ah… Cheezos? Chizzies?” Shin tried to remember the name of her favourite snack that she _hadn’t_ been in a commercial for, halfway to grabbing the menu to squint at the names on it.

“Cheetos?”

“No, Marina, I have _some_ fucking class. Uhm… Cheezas! Cheezas, pwease~”

Kaede handled the invites, naturally, but had also only informed Mizuki that Sanae might not be able to come about an hour before they’d left the office to all go get thoroughly drunk, and the news had hit Mizuki badly. What none of them knew, of course, was that Mizuki was _counting_ on Sanae coming, because she had to finally draw a line in the sand. Clear the air. Put everything in order.

In short, take advantage of being stone drunk to tell Sanae she had _real_ feelings for her.

“Looks like the birthday girl isn’t happy with her own party!”

“Oh, Kaede, don’t be silly! I’m having a great time.” Mizuki assumed that that wasn’t the most convincing she’d ever sounded, but after a brief moment of Kaede studying her face a little longer, it appeared that the woman was sufficiently fooled. That, or going back to her incredibly strong cup of booze was a more exciting and interesting proposition than worrying about her best friend’s transparently obvious discomfort.

“Speaking of great… you know what’s great-ing? Us having only ordered one beer pitcher!”

“Because Sanae isn’t here, I suppose. We’ve been lax.” Shino’s comment earned an understanding nod from the others, as if they too all missed her presence. It was little comfort for Mizuki.

It wasn’t as if her planned confession-- no, not _confession_ , that sounded so immature and girlish. She was still in her prime, but she wasn’t a child. Her, ah, plan to tell Sanae about how she felt (that was at least a little different to a confession, right?) wasn’t completely out of left field, to either of them. Neither of them were stupid - both naturally had picked up on the unresolved tension they shared, through subtle hints like the time they shared a hotel room and ended up spooning in the same bed instead, or that one summer festival with Sanae laid out on her arse and about twelve beers deep telling her that she was absolutely going gay for her, or… Well, none of it was subtle, but they’d been reluctant to act on it. Until now! In theory! If she’d decided to bloody show up!

She'd even sort of planned it out. She and Sanae would be drinking and mucking around, as was the norm, and when Sanae got out whatever incredibly tacky but sweet thing she'd gotten as a present for her, Mizuki would grab her hand and tell her that she'd had another birthday wish involving Sanae, and it would all flow so well and be so elegant. Shin or Kaede would say something utterly inappropriate, they'd all have a laugh, but it would work.

Right now, however, she felt like a petulant child at throwing a tantrum at her own party, a state of mind not helped by just how much alcohol she was ingesting.

“You look down, Mizuki, dear.” Shino reached over the table to gently pat her hand. “Do you need more wine?”

“Well… No, I just…”

“I think you need more wine.” With her free hand, Shino slid a glass of red across the table (already full, somehow, as if giving Mizuki more wine was _always_ going to be the answer to whatever the issue was) which Mizuki reluctantly picked up and less than reluctantly downed a good quarter of. She was irritated, it was free alcohol, who could blame her?

“Oh, did you guys hear? Nana’s finally graduating high school!”

“Pole-dancing isn't as hard as people think, provided you're willing to put in time working on your core.”

“You've never tried a Jagerbomb? Oh, they're wonderful… so wonderful, truly… no, I insist, you must! I wonder if they do them here…”

“Hey, Kaede, so is it true you're on the next Kanye album?”

They all sounded like interesting conversations, but Mizuki simply couldn't convince herself to join in, nodding dumbly at something about Kaede stretching her hands while she looked down at her own. There was a series of knocks at the sliding door, and so she picked up the drinks menu; she had been too busy in wallowing in self pity to lodge an order with Reiko earlier. Sanae or no Sanae, if Kaede was paying for booze tonight (well, technically her and the others, but Kaede was the one making as much money as all their individual salaries and royalties put together and was gracious enough to act appropriately), she’d happily spend as much money getting completely wasted as she could. The door didn't open, though, and a second knock came - and when it did, everyone in the room suddenly turned quiet.

“Ooooh, noooo… I think I know who that is!”

“Who? Come on, Kaeeeeede, spill the beans…” Marina asked her - and for a sometimes actress, it was amazing how unconvincing this  ‘performance’ - whatever it was - sounded.

“It’s the sexy police… I think they might have an arrest permit for the birthday girl!” Kaede turned to Mizuki, giving her a look of conspiratorial excitement, while Mizuki could only stare back in blank, mildly exhausted confusion.

“The stripper’s here!?” Miyu squealed in excitement, while Shin pulled a face of incredibly feigned shock, looking around the room like everyone else wasn’t completely in the know about what was going on. The knocking on the door grew louder, more insistent, and slowly the other women in the room began to slowly shift towards the door, Marina grabbing a handful of snacks and shoving them into her mouth – “Don’t do that!” “It’s protein and carbs, Shin. Important stuff.” – as they moved to leave.

\--had they got some kind of police-themed stripper for her for her birthday? Nice sentiment, she supposed, but it just made her more sad that Sanae wasn't here.

…unless they got one specifically because they _knew_ , and if that was the case, then suddenly Mizuki felt far less appreciative. Did they really have to do that? God, Kaede probably thought it was the single most hilarious thing she’d ever come up with, until next week came and she'd have the awe-inspiring realisation that ‘lemons’ and ‘Le Mans’ are pronounced similarly and filled her Twitter with statuses solely consisting of motorcyles and citrus fruit emojis.                       

“Where are you all going?” And, to be completely fair to her best friend, this would admittedly be fairly funny if they were all there, completely sozzled and laughing their heads off at roasting Mizuki like this, but on her own, it seemed like it would quickly become the most miserable and awkward experience of her life. Even without the whole ‘being far too emotionally distraught that Sanae wasn’t at her party’ thing.

“We’re not the guilty party here, Mizuki. You're the one under public house arrest!”

“Ooh! I love strippers. Strippers are so much fun…” Miyu, clearly absolutely pished to the point of no return, continued to mumble about all the things she finds wonderful about people who take their clothes off for money as Kaede gently guided her out of the room, turning back to Mizuki with a big old wink.

Mizuki, for her part, didn’t bother to wink back, her hollowed-out husks of eyes barely even absorbing the sight of Shino sliding along the floor like a snake as she left, leaving Mizuki all alone in the booth and awaiting the the god-forsaken stripper’s entry.

Maybe she could just open the air vent above her and leave that way.

“Bang!! You're under arrest, babe~”

The voice of the aforementioned Sexy Police sounded familiar. Very familiar.

“An informer told me a naughty birthday girl wasn't having fun at the party her nice friends were throwing for her… That’s an offence worthy of corporal sexy funishment!”

Why had Kaede (because this was absolutely her handiwork.) asked Sanae to pretend to be a stripper for her birthday?

“Sanae…”

“Huhhh? We’re not on a first name basis. I’m an officer of the law, and you’re gonna respect that my standing…”

Clearly Sanae had nothing but absolute confidence that she could fill this role, striding into the room in something Mizuki could only describe as a tight fetish latex-looking cop outfit with forearm-length gloves and thigh-high boots that were definitely not normal police protocol - and more than that, she had a _huge_ grin on her face. Didn’t Sanae still own her actual police uniform? Why did she have to wear this?

....well, from said grin, Mizuki started to assume that Sanae’d picked out this outfit herself.

“You can call me Sexcop. Or Officer Booty. Maybe Sexy Niigata Detective? Help me workshop this a bit, perp~”

“O-Officer Booty?” It was probably the best of the options Sanae was giving her.

“Oooh, gotcha, you’re an ass-woman. Guess I’ll put that one in the case file.”

“No, Sanae, I’m… well, no, I don’t dislike your bum, but--”

“Butt what?” The cop leaned over and grabbed Mizuki by the hair, looking right into her eyes with a big old smile, and Mizuki suddenly realised the thing she’d realised many, many times over the last few months once again, perhaps this time stronger than ever.

_Ah._

_I love her_.

“You cross Officer Booty, and you end up rear-ended… You have a right to remain silent, but you can tell me if you like it~”

“Like wh--” Sanae let go of her head with some force, spinning around on one _ridiculously_ high heel to put Mizuki face to face with her shiny blue behind, gyrating it gently, letting Mizuki take in every little detail… which she did, with a great sense of conflict in her heart. More than being endlessly charming and so much fun to be around, Mizuki couldn’t deny she was attracted to Sanae on a physical level, too, though this somehow felt like the hardest bit to admit; mostly because if she told Kaede about it Kaede would start snapchatting her pictures of piles of hot pants, telling Mizuki she did it because she knew her friend loved ‘short stacks’ _(sic)_.

In any case, it was hard to take her eyes off Sanae’s behind, and Mizuki also had to admit that Sanae really _was_ impressively limber when Sanae started to squat down, beginning a motion approaching-- twerking. Was Sanae twerking right in front of her face? How was she meant to feel about this? Yes, other than the _obvious_.

“Keeping quiet, huh? Tough nut to crack!” That wasn’t strictly true - every so often, Mizuki was letting out a little gasp or squeal, as much as she tried not to. “Now remember, I’m authorised to use force to get you to talk…”

Which seemingly equated to suddenly shoving her rear up against Mizuki’s face, causing her to simultaneously cry out, sharply inhale, and mumble Sanae’s name; all of which were smothered by said behind. The ass is pretty much pressed against her face for a few moments, Mizuki squirming but not exactly pulling away - and when Sanae finally did so, Mizuki instinctively lifted a hand to her mouth to wipe it down, and yet--

It would be so easy to reach forwards and place a hand on Sanae’s buttocks, and in doing so make… some kind of progress. Perhaps.

“You wanna touch? Go on, tamper with that evidence~”

But in response Mizuki simply surrendered and planted her face directly into Sanae’s latex-covered rear, letting out a low groan that sounds somewhere between a wounded elephant and a wounded Nana Abe.

“Oh, uh-- Dang, Mizuki, didn't realise you were that into kissing cop ass! But if you wanna--”

“Sanae…” She nestled a little more into Sanae’s behind before resting one of her cheeks on it, presumably deciding that Sanae was now her pillow.

“...hey, are you kinda… not into this?”

“Oh, no, it's good, it's just…” Mizuki paused, unsure how to complete her sentence, because she _was_ into this, in a way. In a lot of ways. In fact, having Sanae’s arse against her face was absolutely wonderful, but this whole situation was bigger than just the booty. Bigger than just Sanae’s booty. That’s rather big! “...complicated.” Sanae has to know as well as she does, surely; and if she doesn't, then there's no hope for either of them.

“Aaaaah. Yeah.” The Hot Pig tried to look over her shoulder to face Mizuki, but the angle clearly doesn't work, and she instead started slowly moving her ass out from under Mizuki’s face, a motion that Mizuki is a little reluctant to let happen. Still, eventually that comfortable cushion shifted, and Sanae turned to her once again, kneeling down in front of the other woman.

Mizuki turned up to look at Sanae’s face, then looked right in front of her. Then up again. Then in front of her again.

Sanae certainly had a banging bomb body.

“Mm.” She stared deep into the darkness of Sanae’s cleavage, really giving all this a good _think_.

“You doing okay down there, Mizuki?” Mizuki began to nod in response, but then stopped herself.

She wasn’t doing okay. She had a _plan_ , and an _angle_ , and then all of that had been completely and utterly ruined, and frankly this would have been easier to get into if she’d loved Sanae _less_ . Then she could have enjoyed this without thinking about how she wanted to do this right, and then also avoided the self-nagging part of herself telling her that _Sanae is so hot and gorgeous and god give me that arse again when I’m in a better mood and I shan’t even say what I’ll do to it_ \--

“Why are we so bad at this.” Mizuki leaned face-first into Sanae’s chest before reaching across the table and fumbling for a glass - any would do, she felt. Straightening up to take another glug of Shin’s leftover daiquiri, she swirled the glass in her hand while she looked at Sanae as if pitying the both of them.

“At what?”

“At being emotionally inept enough that we need Kaede to convince you to pretend to be a stripper so I can stare melancholically at your breasts.”

“Nah, that’s the problem! We’re not bad at that, we’re good at that!” The real life Sexcop stared down at her with a big old grin, and Mizuki tried to smile in response, but it was clear it wasn’t exactly working. “Haha. Sorry, I don’t tell ‘em like she does. And, I mean… you are getting a pretty good look at the girls down there, huh?”

…Sanae wasn’t wrong about that.

“Mm. And it’s rather good.”

“Man, if the music industry doesn’t work out for me, maybe I can consider that as an option…” Sanae seemed to be seriously considering this idea, and while she was busy staring into the middle distance considering her second radical career change in the last six years, Mizuki took the chance to get to her knees, finally restoring the correct natural order of her being taller than the other woman.

For better or worse, Kaede had provided her with… an opportunity, of sorts, and she had to take full advantage of it. If being heavily drunk, mildly horny, and irritated at her own failings as a human being wasn’t the perfect condition in which to make pretty serious decisions, well, Mizuki wasn’t interested in what would qualify as the right time.

“Sanae?”

“Yep?”

“When would you be free for a date? An actual date.” No, ‘getting lost in Roppongi together and missing the last train and calling up a half-asleep but inexplicably obliging Yuka to ask if she could pick them up and drive them home and then awkwardly drunkenly making out in the back of her car’ didn’t actually count; even if the memory of Yuka angrily smacking her car horn until they stopped said snogfest was one Mizuki wouldn’t soon forget. Of course, she was steeling herself for failure – but her face thankfully managed to hide just how nervous she was.

“…oh. Uh.”

“I mean, if you aren’t, then that’s fine, but we--”

“Nononono!” Sanae jumped up to her feet as if trying to get properly eye level with Mizuki, but realising it made her just a _bit_ too tall, she knelt back down again, placing those strong, well-trained hands that could disarm and/or kill a man on Mizuki’s shoulders. “No, oh my fucking god, Mizuki, I am completely free! I mean, ‘cept when I have work, which is a lot of the time, but – look, let me check on my phone…” She reached behind her, looking clearly irritated when she remembered that her phone was stuffed in the locker at the front of the bar because it wouldn’t actually fit in the tiny plasticky vaguely police-themed microskirt she was in. “…okay, no phone, but! Yeah! Literally whenever!”

“Perhaps… tomorrow?” Mizuki almost felt her heart rise in her throat as she suggested it, unsure of just how drunk she was right now. Drunk enough to hallucinate?

“Yeah! Unless I’m not actually free then, but… you get what I’m getting at here, right?”

“Oh, yes. I understand.”  Natural composure was a funny thing, Mizuki thought. She couldn’t comprehend how on earth she wasn’t a blubbering mess wiping her tears on Sanae’s boobs right now, but yet instead she was looking the tiny determined woman in the eyes with a broad smile. Why, she wondered if she almost looked confident! “Tomorrow, or the day after, or… whenever works.”

“Yeah! Oh my god. I thought you’d never ask… mm.” Sanae seemed a little unhappy with her own phrasing, lifting the police cap off her head and fanning herself with it. “Nah, that’s not fair. I thought we’d never, uh, ask each other? I thought we’d never figure it out!”

“Despite the spooning.”

“Yep.” They both shared a laugh, Mizuki finishing off Shin’s drink for her and putting it back on the table.

“I’m not—drunk, am I? This did actually happen.”

“Uh, you’re definitely drunk. Y’all look like you were taking some pretty big sippies.” Mizuki could see that Sanae was using up all of her mental fortitude to stop from reaching over and helping herself to the booze on the table. She was, after all, technically on the job right now. It was admirable professionalism. “But it happened! And it’s happening! All that good shit.”

“Then this is happening, too,” Mizuki told her, and she leaned forwards, placing her lips on Sanae’s for a little peck, holding there for as long as she’s comfortable for. Sanae, for her part, ended up quite flushed. They’d kissed more deeply, but never so _meaningfully_ , Mizuki felt.

“Aww. Uh. Mmm.” Screw professionalism, because Sanae now went to grab what was probably Reiko’s wine glass, giving it a quick down for a shot of confidence. “You, uh. Don’t wanna go further?”

“I do, but we can save that for the date.” Tapping Sanae on the shoulder, Mizuki jerked her head to the side, too - towards the door. “And, knowing our mutual friend, I assume she’s out there watching us right n--”

“Ooooo _oooooooh noooooooooo_ how did you _knooooooow_ …” Party poppers at the ready, Shino adorned with three party hats, Kaede led the charge of the rest of the team back into the room, waving her arms in the air. “Happy birthday, Mizuki!!! Did you like your present?”

“I would have preferred her without the gift-wrapping.”

“...oooh, wowie, Mizuki’s a thirsty lil’ flower--”

“Not like that, Shin. Crawl back into your cave.” With a pout, Shin dived headfirst into Marina’s chest, while Miyu came over to give Mizuki’s shoulder a quiet but celebratory pat.

“Shall we have some celebratory shots…?”

“Shots? I love shots!!!” Sanae reached up for a high five, which Miyu equally eagerly returned, and it’s immediately clear how much her being around lightens the party - and more than that, it leaves Mizuki on cloud nine.

* * *

 

At three in the morning, the evening had finally drawn to a close, and Reiko was in the process of corraling the group and calling them taxis. Mizuki and Kaede stood at the back of the queue, watching Sanae talk shit at Shin with considerable amusement.

“Soooo. How was it?”

“As if you weren’t watching the entire time.”

“Why, I never! I wouldn’t intrude on a friend’s lap dance.” Kaede looked genuinely offended by the statement, but Mizuki’s not bothered to argue right now.

“But, uh… thank you. I really do appreciate it. Very much.”

“I thought you’d be a little more annoyed at me, honestly!”

“Oh, no, I was. If I hadn’t somehow managed to convince myself to ask her out, I’d be clawing out your throat right now.”

“But you did it!” She gave Mizuki a hearty slap on the back, rough to the point Mizuki sputtered. “If you ever want help with these things, you know, you can just tell me. You can trust me to help you with your secrets. You can have… confide-nce…”

“Mm.” Mizuki gave her a smile in return, before looking up at the November night sky. Tomorrow really couldn’t come soon enough, even if the hangover was going to leave her essentially non-functional until the afternoon.

“That being said… I feel it’s important to return the favour.”

“I’m not sure if I’m up to the task of getting someone to strip for you, Kaede.”

“No, no! Not like that! This is about questions and secrets and all that.”

Goosebumps rose on Mizuki’s neck as she heard this, and it wasn’t from the cold.

“What is it?”

“So when you shared that hotel room with Sanae, which of you was the big spoon?”

“--how do you know about that.” Mizuki spat out each word through gritted teeth, Kaede seemingly not finding the question at _all_ a taboo topic.

“Oh, because Sanae tells me everything.” _What on earth. Why. Had they decided on this whole dumb stripper thing together_. “So! Do tell~”

“...it was me.”

“...ooooh. Unexpected but… No, it _does_ make sense. You really are a thirsty little flower--”

Mizuki picked herself up off the wall and walked right towards Reiko, skipping ahead of the others and trying to jam herself into a cab - but not before giving a grudging wave to Kaede, and shouting in Sanae’s general direction.

“I’ll see you tomorrow!”

“Yes! Definitely! Maybe on Monday! But yes!” Their eyes met, Mizuki giving her a little smile and Sanae coming back with a huge, sparkling grin, so big it looks like it’s going to escape from her face.

...here goes.

“I love you, Sanae!”

“Love you too, babe~”

And as Mizuki ducked into the taxi and gave the driver the address, she sat back with a sigh. When was the last time she was so excited about a date? As ridiculous as it sounds, there was  this undeniable giddiness running through her, making her happy for this, for _everything_. For Kaede’s silliness, and her friends’ affection, and for Sanae’s everything.

Right now, she really _did_ feel thirty-three years young.

**Author's Note:**

> happy birthday mizuki!! i hope you and your sexy cop gf get a card together again sometime soon
> 
> also Cheezas are a real jp snack! they're actually quite nice but they're a lil overpriced, but they taste Properly Cheesy. I like the avocado ones a lot too.
> 
> sanae wasnt dancing to music but if she had been it would have been lil wayne's ms officer. thank you.


End file.
